Hmm, I think I'm gonna stop blogging..
Yeah congrats you guys whose eyes were hurt by my posts, no more pain to suffer no more. Don't know why, I just wanna cut this out. Actually, I do know why.
I don't think I have any purpose on doing this anymore, yeah, the reason, "I want to make a timeline of my life," were just merely a catsyit. I always keep a journal by typing in notepad, there's no reason to publish it.
My actual reason, is..
To share something to someone
Someone, whom I call..
Aurora
Someone whom I love so much
Someone who somehow I never had the chance to talk with
Someone who deserves someone better
She's the reason I blogged, it's the only way I tell my story to her. Share stories to a girlfriend by blog, pathetic huh wouldn't you think?
But now, there's no point on doing this. Yeah, what would she care? She never care from the first place. Yeah, sound psychic wannabe, but it's just, I don't know, helpless.
I don't wanna call it hopeless anymore, cause I realize that God always gives us hope. We've got chance, but I dunno, maybe it's invisible for her to see it as it is to see me probably.
Nah that's all my pathetical mumblings, ya Allah dhel pathetic ko keterlaluan ya.
Finally, I'm signing out.
Assalamualaikum Wr Wb
"Final Distance," -Utada Hikaru
Monday, 23 November 2009
Reminiscence
Memory..
hmm the thing I treasured the most in this mixed up world.
oke stop inglising somehow gaenak di denger.
ya, gue orang kompulsif yang terlalu mencintai memori, karena entah kenapa itu bener-bener berarti buat gue, all those experiences, laughs, cries, and pungpungpungpung, it's just, hmm I don't know to say it -mule sok inglis lagi d'oh-.
hmm, gue bisa ngabisin berapa lama pun waktu gue buat berpikir, merenung, apakeklah sebutannya, sebut aja "reminiscing". dan gue bersyukur gue bisa disebut bolang, karena biasanya keliling jakarta dengan kendaraan umum -gada korelasinya, bentar- dimana selalu ada hal baru setiap hari, pasti ada aja kejadian unik di jalan, gue bisa mempelajari karakter banyak orang, ya intinya I'm kinda sorry for those good for nothing gasoline waster yang jarang mau make kendaraan umum.
dan yah, balik lagi ke topik, di perjalanan pasti ada aja waktu dimana lo mati gaya, disanalah otak gue mule scanning memori-memori gue. dan maka dari itu, akhir-akhir ini, I can't get through the 10th minute without a tear, hm gue gatau ya, yang bisa gue lakuin cuma nanya, kenapa bisa gini.
hufff susah jadi orang kompulsif, gue nyadar kalo emang ini kejiwaan bermasalah yang ada kalo lebay gini, tapi tetep aja susah. gue udah kebalik sama prinsip gue pas kelas 7, "what's done is done, you can't turn back time, so just shut up." mungkin sejak kejadian pencurian di rumah gue, gue menganggap semua hal sangat berharga, terlalu berharga tepatnya, dan justru itu jadi salah, dan gue sadar, tapi tetep aja, apasih udahlah.
yang lebih naas lagi, kalo gue keilangan semacam memory holder, gue bisa gila sampe kapantau, and shed a tear probably -yeah i know i'm a sissy whiny good for nothing boy-. contoh: cos a + sin a = 270, berapakah alpha + beta + gamma? iya garing tau. contoh, gue gabisa keilangan data se ga penting apapun, dan hm, I've lost my PS2 memory card, 2 USBs, chat logs, and soon to be but hopefully not, my saved messages from my w850i. udah cukup gila gue keilangan banyak data karena lepi diformat.
hm, gue nolak buat ngebetulin HP gue karena harus diformat, dan itu emang goblok, but still, could any phone things probs be solved without formatting it? tolong, itu sangat berharga buat gue, gue ga pengen lupain semua yang udah gue laluin 2taon lebih sama tuh hp, terlalu banyak memori yang menurut gue penting disana.
hmm, emang gue masih dituntut buat ikhlas keilangan memori-memori itu, ikhlas keilangan apapun, dan ikhlas keilangan seseorang juga, karena gue tau dia bakal lebih bae tanpa gue.
Ya Allah tolonglah hamba, a~mii~n.
*My largest wish for now is my HP LCD could light up, and I'll type every detail of all of my messages to my notepad, for real
*Dari pagi belom makan ga laper-laper tumben
*Belom ngafalin skrip buat drama B Ing, oke
hmm the thing I treasured the most in this mixed up world.
oke stop inglising somehow gaenak di denger.
ya, gue orang kompulsif yang terlalu mencintai memori, karena entah kenapa itu bener-bener berarti buat gue, all those experiences, laughs, cries, and pungpungpungpung, it's just, hmm I don't know to say it -mule sok inglis lagi d'oh-.
hmm, gue bisa ngabisin berapa lama pun waktu gue buat berpikir, merenung, apakeklah sebutannya, sebut aja "reminiscing". dan gue bersyukur gue bisa disebut bolang, karena biasanya keliling jakarta dengan kendaraan umum -gada korelasinya, bentar- dimana selalu ada hal baru setiap hari, pasti ada aja kejadian unik di jalan, gue bisa mempelajari karakter banyak orang, ya intinya I'm kinda sorry for those good for nothing gasoline waster yang jarang mau make kendaraan umum.
dan yah, balik lagi ke topik, di perjalanan pasti ada aja waktu dimana lo mati gaya, disanalah otak gue mule scanning memori-memori gue. dan maka dari itu, akhir-akhir ini, I can't get through the 10th minute without a tear, hm gue gatau ya, yang bisa gue lakuin cuma nanya, kenapa bisa gini.
hufff susah jadi orang kompulsif, gue nyadar kalo emang ini kejiwaan bermasalah yang ada kalo lebay gini, tapi tetep aja susah. gue udah kebalik sama prinsip gue pas kelas 7, "what's done is done, you can't turn back time, so just shut up." mungkin sejak kejadian pencurian di rumah gue, gue menganggap semua hal sangat berharga, terlalu berharga tepatnya, dan justru itu jadi salah, dan gue sadar, tapi tetep aja, apasih udahlah.
yang lebih naas lagi, kalo gue keilangan semacam memory holder, gue bisa gila sampe kapantau, and shed a tear probably -yeah i know i'm a sissy whiny good for nothing boy-. contoh: cos a + sin a = 270, berapakah alpha + beta + gamma? iya garing tau. contoh, gue gabisa keilangan data se ga penting apapun, dan hm, I've lost my PS2 memory card, 2 USBs, chat logs, and soon to be but hopefully not, my saved messages from my w850i. udah cukup gila gue keilangan banyak data karena lepi diformat.
hm, gue nolak buat ngebetulin HP gue karena harus diformat, dan itu emang goblok, but still, could any phone things probs be solved without formatting it? tolong, itu sangat berharga buat gue, gue ga pengen lupain semua yang udah gue laluin 2taon lebih sama tuh hp, terlalu banyak memori yang menurut gue penting disana.
hmm, emang gue masih dituntut buat ikhlas keilangan memori-memori itu, ikhlas keilangan apapun, dan ikhlas keilangan seseorang juga, karena gue tau dia bakal lebih bae tanpa gue.
Ya Allah tolonglah hamba, a~mii~n.
*My largest wish for now is my HP LCD could light up, and I'll type every detail of all of my messages to my notepad, for real
*Dari pagi belom makan ga laper-laper tumben
*Belom ngafalin skrip buat drama B Ing, oke
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